First week starting tutorial/ practical classes

Finally all the classes started this week. For the whole week, there is only 3 lecture classes, which means I will only be able to see LG 3 days a week... which is a good thing. This whole week have been hanging out with W, CK, Pilla and YC most of the time (all 4 are girls). Haha, I know I should be hanging out more with the guys but somehow we just don't click. Now I know how it feels to be the only boy in a group, lol...

Yesterday yamcha with Ah Ming, which is very sudden. I can't yamcha on Sunday, Monday and Tuesday night as I got an 8am class the following day but since it was him, an exception is given, haha. He fetched me and Daniel to yamcha at Bangi Kopitiam in Taman Melawati town.

We jokes and talked about many stuffs, including our love lives. Then it hit me... should I really tell LG that I like her? Although I already know the answer, but is telling her going to make any difference? ...................... No, I dont think so.

Maybe it was because of the trauma I felt when chasing YLin. At that time I did a lot of stuff to please her, including going far places just to find her by LRT, buying her stuffs to please her, call her everyday, etc. But now... I don't do those stuff anymore..... Why??

The feeling of rejected after 100% sure of getting a girl really hits deep. Somehow deep inside... I don't trust love anymore, although I yearn for it. That's why I did all those 'safe' stuffs like asking friends/ spies for info on a girl I like. It makes me feel safer because I won't feel that 'killing pain' of being rejected, face to face anymore. If you don't put that much hope, then you won't feel that much pain. That's what I think...

Pathetic philosophy, I know, haha... but it's hard to cure a trauma once it hits you 'hard', and I mean Rock Bottom Hard that HARD. So many maybe, so many uncertainties... I don't think I will succeed in this game called love..... for a long long time.

Currently I'm happy hanging out with W and friends. She's now the 'printing manager' too, which is like an assistant to me, the class rep, haha. But she's gonna 'eat' a lot of money... haha. Anyway, friendship is my way of curing loneliness... to stop 'thinking' too much... and forgets LG.