Another 'long lost love' dream

The night after I posted about Sun and stuffs, the brain is playing tricks on me again. This time I had a dream about an old love... or 'admiration', whatever... it's GL, the first girl I ever really loved in my secondary school days. It's weird that I have never even think about her for a long time but she somehow ends up in my dream. The dream is set somehow in the 'present'. I was at her house or something, we are chatting and joking like buddies, and somehow I hinted her to be my gf, and she, being her, also hinted back 'ok'. She has the same attitude like the last time I met her (tom boyish). Man these dreams feels so real sometimes. 

When I woke up, I was... happy. The brain really works in strange ways sometimes. Oh well, better that than dreams of falling down a pit or trapped underneath the ground or something. Unfortunately there's no way she and I will be together as she's happily living in Australia with her family, and me too over here. Oh well, dreams... if only we can control dreams one day in the future, won't that be exciting? Everyday woke up happy, even if temporary. IF only..... Happy dreaming all!

Inflation on the rise, so what's new?

Yup, another world crisis. This time more 'down to earth', not spreading through touching or sneezing. MONEY problem. A world crisis as stupid Russia is attacking Ukraine, making this and that price increase. People getting out more as pandemic slowly losing its' power (which is great) but necessity not enough, so price increase lor (shit). For those who are still living and did not die from Covid, it's time to suffer again (round 2). Hooray...

Let's forget the misery and come back to me. So what's up for the last 3 months? Hmm... everything is normal, just the way I like it. When free, play games. When TOO free, miss YL or some other girls due to loneliness. When SUPER free, find something to do so wont be TOO free and think too much again. Yup, free and easy, the life of a single haha...

Maybe due to getting o...ol... matured. Have to frequently wear spec nowadays else may feel slight headache from using too much eye power (and things become blurry, shit). No gym for months as my gym kaki busy with his life and work. Now it is I who keep pressuring him 'When gym, boss?' haha. Sugar level under control with a bit of medication (1). Oh ya, started investing in public mutual fund now, as advised by my bro's wife. Getting a bunch of money when I retire sounds good IF I still live by then. This is against my YOLO rule! But being human, you got to think for the future sometimes (don't rely on the stupid government, all politicians only want to makan money, it's either big or small only).

Work is getting easier as finally getting 4 person for my CC. A huge difference between 3 to 4 person. Hope nobody's leaving then my life will be a lot easier. I deserve this ok? Been working 2 man's job for the past 4 years. Pay was miserable at first, now getting better. Still lower than all my friend's working in KL but the cost of living is lower, so oklah. No house but got car, health, happiness and money in my bank, what more can you wish for? In the end, being happy tops all, even money or love.

Love? No luck. Keep myself 'hating' Sun so I won't miss her, but when I saw her, my 'wall' toppled down like Lego. Damn it, why did I have to meet her? Can't we be normal colleagues without bumping into each other AT ALL?!? Sigh... stupid brain keep thinking of her after bumping her that day. She is a witch and cursed me! I WILL break this curse, I MUST!

That's all folks, cya~!

March updates

 Another month goes by and much things bad happened compared to good. In this new era, there can still be war declared - by Russia on Ukraine. No matter how war is always not the right thing to do. Should just kill the leader to stop the war which will kill even more people. Such is the fate of citizens... 

Covid cases have hit an all time high, again. Hong Kong is badly affected, Malaysia too. But Malaysia politicians, as usual, doesn't really care and going to open up the border next month. God save us all (and kill all those idiots please)...

My colleague, Am, is throwing his resignation letter, again. I suspect he was pushing us for the increment last time so he can get it before he really resign this time (but still fail). So he will be leaving next month with no increment at all (said to give by end of this month). Oh well, the new company with salary increased to nearly 1k and tons of benefits, if me also I sure go lah haha. Good luck to you dude, all the best! But on a good note a new CC member, Shah, has entered our group (before Am threw his letter).

Susan has given birth yesterday, yay! Congratulations girl, now a mummy. I hope your child will grow up as beautiful as you, I truly do...

The big boss' wife passed away last 2 weeks ago. We went to the house (2 days) where they hold the ceremony and all, it was quite grand. It was a sad thing as she battled leukemia for nearly 3 years, her face and body has totally changed due to treatment. Spent nearly 2mil I heard, but can't survive as the body couldn't accept the new bone marrow after transplant. At the age of 54, that is such a young age to leave, yet to enjoy life to the fullest and did so much for her family. Rest in peace...

My bro, SKY, was also hit with Covid last month. Luckily it was mild only and did not infect the other family members. Now he is working as usual already.

Times are really bad now. War, petrol price hike, everything becomes expensive, deaths, Covids... One can only become sane in these troubled times with a strong will and determination. Be it for love, family, games, vacation, luxury, ambition, etc... the most important thing of all is to stay positive and happy, for as long as you live. Without soul we are already dead inside, peace~

New year, still old me

 First post of the year, let's summarize what have happened so far:

• Susan is pregnant, quite late too. I suspect she got married so fast was because of... But I'm happy that she's going to have a kid soon. Have a happy family, you deserve it girl

• Yeng Sun hate me, it's a conlanfirm fact. Wanted to befriend her in FB but don't accept. Accidentally saw her Instagram (public) so I followed her. Less than 1 week later I checked her Instagram again (now private). Urgh! Didn't know I could make such a huge impact on a girl, although for the wrong reasons haha. Oh well, I hate her too, good riddance

• Work still busy as usual. A 3 years old colleague Am nearly resigned (which will spell dead for me as we are already understaffed) because his wife wanted him to move to another better company with higher pay. Don't know why he didn't go (I was even encouraging him to go as the pay and benefits of an international company is WAY better than ours) but maybe he prefer staying to work here (not too hard, flexible... just busy sometimes). He's always sick or family sick (so took a lot of leave), maybe he knows his own capabilities too. Oh well, to each man their own...

• Got 1 and a half month bonus this year, yay! Bought a Nintendo Switch with it and the balance on a new phone (as my 3 year phone is starting to act up). Life is quite lonely sometimes but with money for myself, I can spend it on anything I want! Don't need to keep for wife and family lah, house lah, kids lah, mother in law lah, etc... being single DO have it's own benefits, haha

• So now 'targetless'... Just caring for my family and myself, and sometimes my other friends, is sufficient for me, I think. Getting old, although I hate to admit it, sucks. Need to take care of body more lah, cannot cincai eat this and that lah, only sometimes can reward myself and eat this lah, man I miss school days! 

That's all for now, got to go pick up my dad from office and then go for dinner. Stay safe everyone~!

Colleagues comes and goes, like love...?

 Early this month a new colleague join my team, as the last one was forced to quit due to sickness (I think cancer, at such a young age, really pity him). He was in for only 1 month plus. As I train the new guy, another old colleague, Muizz, suddenly quit due to finding another prospect else where (2 times his salary now, wow... higher than mine!). Luckily he quit at the end of the month, so I got some time to train the new guy, hopefully. Man, I feel like quitting too... working here is really stressful and not so high income too. Just hang on a while, maybe next year will be better...

Travel ban has been lifted and I went to Perak to visit mom's friends (sick) with dad. Was a one day trip, a bit tired, but was able to eat and buy some food back. A mediocre kind of trip, I would say. Would have been better if I was with my loved one (if I have one) haha...

Got a toothache now, argh! Maybe will go to the dentist if persist tomorrow. Work has been hectic, no luck in the love department as always, but games are good (a new super robot war was released, yay!). Grateful for having a peaceful life here with my parents, wish I... nvm, got or not, life goes on. All the best, cya~!

Another one 'gone'

Another girl I fancied, Susan, just got married. I am happy for her, although there is a little sadness in my heart. She is one of the girl that is really kind to me with no bad traits at all, actually the best among all. Wont swear or emo, always smile and won't get angry. I wish her all the best with her loved one. She deserves the best of the best.

There's only 1 girl I fancied which hasn't marry yet, but she's a bit 'spicy'. Won't be chasing her since she always gives me the cold shoulders and already have a bf (and younger than me 8 years too). I always fell for the wrong ones, I know, haha...

So MCO is going to be lifted soon. Travelling cross states will be opened and finally, maybe, I can go back KL as my bro's wife is busy with work and can't get leave or something to come Pg. Been cooped up at home for months, which doesn't bother me, but sure many wants out now haha. The covid cases is still plenty but as all 3 of us are fully vaccinated and no kids around, shouldn't be a problem. Just need to follow SOPs.

Been busy working as usual. Bought some nice 'waifu cards' I found on shopee haha. Also bought a new card folder because of it (cheaper than you buy in shops, man I should have done this last time!). Bought Diablo 2 remastered and playing with Jimmy on weekends, sometimes, if both of us are free. Long time didn't go gym so getting a bit weaker and rose like 2kg. Our office was once 'raided' by 3 cops, checking if we break any SOPs (because we opened the main shutter door). Nothing happened, luckily. 

What made me pissed is recently... well work related, nvm. Work is not easy especially when you need to take care of 4 people under you. Being too hard they complain, being too soft they trample over you. Life as an executive but work like a manager, bah humbug~!

That's all folks. Stay safe everyone~!

Aik So Cute!

Just now, when I was about to leave the office, I opened the door and was surprised to see 'Sun' there. So I let out a sound 'Aik?' with surprised. She then replied back 'Aik', which should be just for fun imitating what I said. Then she went back home and I went back upstairs to my office.

Now thinking back, it was cute when she said that... really cute that it keeps repeating in my head a few times. This must be the after effects of not talking to any girls these past few weeks due to work from home. Wake up man, wake up! It's just an 'Aik', nothing more! Sigh.....

One of those nice dreams

Actually nothing biggie, just want to write down for fun. Last night I had a good dream (yeah, quite a long time no dreamt this good) where one of the girl I admired, Susan, was in it. Nothing fancy or dirty happened in it, just me and her chatting something (forgotten what, hard to recall). Then me, being me, tried to make her happy and wrote a poem for her, in which she happily smiled and praised me. We were not dating nor are we a couple, just me and her as friends, even in the dream. I remembered it fondly as I was happy when I woke up, which again, was rare nowadays. It was sweet, it was nice, it was... a dream.

I know it was my friend, loneliness, that paid me a visit, yet it was still... a nice short moment I needed to boost myself up, in these mundane and sometimes stale moments... I call life.

A good start for the year?

 Today got my pay slip. It was unusually big, so I know it must include the long awaited 'increment'. I opened the envelope, check the increment letter and I was semi-shocked (as my dad got hinted to me before) that the percentage of increment was around 23%! Yeah, not bad, woohoo~! Actually my salary was quite low, so adding this much is a big step up. Plus it's already delayed (last year no increment). With more money I can buy more figurines, haha... Just joking, I usually limit myself to buy 1 per month or 2 ONLY.

I wonder if I'm eligible for taxing now or not? Still not yet hit the ?? mark, I don't think so. And with the CNY coming, 1 month bonus should be coming too. Maybe I should treat myself to a PS5? Maybe later...

Covid in Malaysia is hitting record high with passing over 5k cases per day. Looks like CNY this year will be spent without going anywhere (no Genting too). Damn, my new Magic box (share with bro) have to wait longer before can be opened together.

Just now on the way back from home, after lunch, I hear one of my favorite songs on the radio. Why I love it is besides the nice tune, the lyrics best describe what I wanted to say to YL. It goes like this:


I never had a dream come true
'Til the day that I found you
Even though I pretend that I've moved on
You'll always be my baby
I never found the words to say
You're the one I think about each day
And I know no matter where life takes me to
A part of me will always be with you...


Yeah, life goes on even if YL is already married and have kids of her own. I have moved on, but a part of me will always be with her. I seriously think I owe her something in my past life else I wouldn't... Oh well, wish her all the best. Time to live my life for my parents, my home, myself..... and hopefully my 'future life'.

New Year 2021 is here~!

So another year has gone by, just like that. It was a horrible year indeed. With Covid spreading and chaos happening here and there, it was a year we truly do not wish to repeat. Many things happened, new SOPs to follow (to curb the spread), people losing their jobs, companies and shops closing down, price of items increased, etc. I hope 2021 will be kinder to all of us...

So what GOOD things happened to me in 2020? Let's see:

1. Worked at home a few months (yay~!)

2. No salary cut but workload increased (yes!/wth!?)

3. Bought myself a super expensive Samsung Galaxy Tab S7 (3k, ouch) but happy with it

4. The TV spoilt, changed to a new 4k HDTV (really big color difference, wow~!)

5. Bought myself some figurines (mostly Rem, haha) and 2 'special' ones

Some BAD things, that I remember, are:

1. Health deteriorate (need to eat 1 medicine everyday, damn)

2. Need to FURTHER control my diet (eat less, less sugar/fat)

3. Wasted my gym money as only go less than half (due to fear of covid) and expired now

4. Stress and workload adding up (working with an idiot CEO, figures)
5. Still no luck in my love life (getting used to it already)

Still, I am grateful as I am already more lucky than most people out there now, living moderately and enjoy my life as happy as I could. Maybe being single is not so bad, at least I have more money for myself (planning to buy another big thing this year, maybe PS5?). Parents are starting to enjoy life more now too. Go out eat at Japanese shop a few times, and other expensive shop s too. Not kidding, before this we never do that... or a few years only do once. Enjoying life is a good thing, why save so much for? Save enough will be efficient. Balance is key.

Actually liked a girl in my office, but was told by my one colleague that I don't suit her. Maybe he got ask her if she likes me. I believe him as she doesn't smile to me whenever we meet, and only greet me when I greet her first. Heard this year dog is not a good year, except financially. Aii..... life goes on. See ya~!

Getting aged without realizing it

Wow, how time flies without me realizing it. Still feel like I'm in my 20s or early 30s. Then when I register for the government financial aid thingy, which need me to enter my age. The horror of realizing how old I am now (shriek!). No wonder some of the people that don't know me (like cashiers) will call me uncle (noooo!). Haha, don't know if I should be laughing or be sad. How time flies when you're living life as full as you can be.

Nah, who says you must act o** even when age tells you that you're o**? Just live life as happy and vibrant as you choose it to be. Life will be young and energetic or o** and boring, as you want it to be. Urgh, damn white hairs, else people wont call me that 'aged' now.

Live life young, that's ONE of my life's motto haha. Ciao~!